OK. Now Andy Will Do His Talk On Telstra
Despite the fact that Telstra (and, ergo, Bigpond) suck copious amounts of donkey cock, I think we can all agree that the Bigpond advertisment with Daniel and the rabbit proof wall of China is pretty fucking funny.
Then I came across this article from The Australian:
Telstra rabbit film hops into taxpayers (full article)
TELSTRA, one of the nation’s biggest advertisers, plans to seek millions from taxpayers to make a film featuring the father-and-son characters from its BigPond “Rabbits” commercials.
Independent producers say it would be “totally inappropriate” for a company that size to seek government support for its marketing activities.
It is understood that ideas for the film script, which would promote Telstra’s BigPond internet brand, include having Daniel, the son in the popular commercial, look on the internet for a suitable wife for Patrick, his father.
An advertising representative for Telstra — which was Australia’s third-biggest advertiser last year, with a budget of more than $130 million — said the telco would approach all the federal and state funding bodies for help to keep its costs down.
…
Geoff Brown, executive director of independent producers body Screen Producers Association of Australia, estimated it would cost about $5 million to make a well-scripted comedy.
I could go on a long winded rant about how fucked up this is. But instead, I’ll condense it as it’s late and I’m fucking tired.
Fuck Telstra. After reading a letter from them informing me that my line rental and call charges are increasing, how can I calmly accept that they seriously want taxpayers to fund a movie that amounts to essentially nothing more than a 90-minute advertisment for their shitty and overpriced internet service?
While we’re on the topic: Australian moofies suck. No matter how much fucking money is sunk into them, they suck. Not to say the current offerings from Hollywood are much better. Working Dog made The Castle on a budget of around $500,000, and that turned out to be an orright flick. No fucking advertisment needs to cost 10 times that, and shouldn’t be funded by fucking taxpayers.
What really bothers me though is that there are probably a sufficient number of fuckwits out there who will gladly buy this proposed rubbish on DVD for $34.99 the day it fucking comes out in stores.
Fuck Telstra, fuck stupid people and fuck fuck fuck fuck. FUCK.
WTF – It would be trash. When the film Kenny was made the guy who owns the port-a-loo company half funded the movie because he knew he could get some easy advertising in. Fair enough, piss funny movie.
If telstra want to make a movie about a former postie and an ugly dumb ass kid trawling the internet wondering why Telstra want to sign them onto an almighty expesive plan for 3 years then good for them. I will definately not be going to watch it, buy the dvd or even watch a pirated copy.
Fuck the idea and Fuck Telstra. They lost their sole when they changed from telecom.
BigPond advertising… Great wall of china… chinese internet censorship… and now Australia is going to have mandatory internet content filtering, just like China.
Spooky. Very spooky.
I should have seen it coming when that slimy little weasel Rudd started talking Mandarin.
What ruined The Castle was people quoting it. “It’s going straight in the pool room”. Man, you’re hilarious. Now do Borat… In character.
Judging from what Telstra are doing to me via my bills, any film made by them would more than likely be pornographic, something along the lines of fisting and/or water sports (which makes me wonder why andy b is so upset). Having an old bloke and a kid star in it just makes me shudder.
In all seriousness, the first ad about the great wall was funny. The second one about Australia Day – slightly amusing. By the time we get down to an actual film, it will be shit. Shit after getting dragged through x-number of committees, sample groups, market research etc.
This is a bad idea in every way.
So glad to hear you came across telstra.
Tesltra are cunts. My old man worked for the cunts until they retrenched him off back in 2000. A cunt act!
Maybe you should inform the fellas at Tech Talk about this bullshit.
Dam Buster: They may well have lost their soul too. ;)
Metaxus: Oh fuck me, are you one of them Liberal voters too?
corym: You’re dreamin’!
Kempy: But it will be about looking for women on the internet. Something you might find useful.
Rebecca: You dirty minded bitch!
Huggies: Ring them up and inform them they are cunts. But do it from a public phonebox.
Huggies – My old man worked for Telecom for 38 years and was given a choice. Either take a promotion where he knew he would have to sack most of his workmates or be retrenched. His team went from about 16 to 1 over a period of 8 years.
Yes i know technology has made things work a lot easier but seriously one guy cannot do the work that 16 or so used to do.
Fuck Telstra – I am not connected to them via home phone, mobile or internet. Their plans suck. They rip you off. Their shares suck.
$50 to connect to their service is such a rip off. it takes 5 mins on the phone to type some stuff in the computer and it is done. If you disconnected in the old days someone would have to physically go to the relay associated with the number and put some insulators in to cut off the phone.
Andy, I vote cos I have to, not because I want to. If I could remove myself from the electoral role and never have to vote again, I’d do it in a heartbeat.
Besides which, It doesn’t matter who I voted for, we’re all fucked in the end anyway!
If anyone could remove themselves from the electoral role, it would lose about 90% overnight. Judging from the number of fuck-tards caught jaywalking in front of uniformed police these past few days, losing 90% might be the blessing we need right now.
Metaxus: You don’t have to vote. All you have to do is turn up and have your name marked off the roll. What you do with the papers after that is up to you.
Kempy: Or do you mean the electoral roll?